Who Celebrates a 3048th Birthday Anyways?

"Its quiet. Too Quiet." Quiet with a capital Q, which Mei even thought in her head. Things had to have proper Emphasis capitals, even in your own thoughts. Why? Else your mind would get cluttered and words that you spoke as well. As Mei pondered the questions her thought brought her to, she almost forgot why she thought it was too quiet in the first place. There was no life, no one here in the Division. No sounds from anything but birds or insects, or even the cicadas which she killed on sight but which were a staple of random Japanese themed things. Now why ever did she think that? In her dotage she must be losing her mind. Well loosening her grasp a bit more on it. At this point it should be mostly over the cliff, hanging by mere threads.

She needed a mind organizer badly and her mind wandered off into thoughts of who could have a psychic Zanpakuto or even latent powers. Mei Suou, Sotaicho, would promote them immediately to be her assistant and write down all she thought and organize it for her. Well she would if she could FIND anyone. That there was no one here was why she was letting her mind wander. Maybe it held the key to why all of Division One had vanished off the map. Almost like a tickle on her brain, she knew there was something she was missing. Something important. There was a reason everyone was gone and yet it kept floating away on the winds near the cliff that her mind hung over.

Her staff chimed as she clicked it to the pathway, and she continued on her way. Too bad no one was around for her birthday. She had an amazing party planned. Now where could they be?

"Hmm hmmm hmmm~" Narue skipped forward towards the gates of the First Division, a bag slumped over her shoulders, giving a bounce with every step. "Sou-tai-chou's birthday, hmm hmmm~ Right Hato-kun? We got an okay present right? You think so? Heheh." She clutched the plush close, pleased with her gift shopping as she walked through the gates and wandered the division halls.

"Sou~ Tai~ Choooo~!" She sang, not even noticing the quietness of the division itself.

Norma hobbled through the gates of squad one for the captain's birthday party. Why did she bother with such things? She'd much rather be drinking tea and napping in her easy chair. It was a party so she didn't bother wearing her uniform. Instead she opted for a simply black dress with a high neck line and a hem line that stopped at her ankles. Norma always dressed like she was going to a funeral.

In her left hand Norma held an exquisitely wrapped bow. The paper was an eggplant purple with and gold and black bow. Inside the box was a very beautiful set of pearl jewelry. Norma was grumpy, but she always gave really good gifts.

Norma held her cane and the gift tightly as she slowly, but surely made her way into the squad one compound.

Two non seated members grumbled to themselves as they carried the large gift wrapped box through division one.

"What the hell is in this thing?" One asked.

"Hell if I know. Gift to the captain from Hueco Mundo. Or... Whatever its called these days."

"Didn't know they were in the business of sending birthday gifts."

"Hah. Newbie. You should've seen what got sent last year."

"What was it?"

"cats."

"Cats?"

"yup."

"That's it?"

"Oh, it was a lot of cats."

"How many?"

"Well. According to the card, one for every year."

"But.... But I heard the head captain is over three thousand years old! There were three thousand cats?"

"Well... I don't think they counted."

They did, actually.

"whatever. Let's get this thing to the place.and get out of here just in case. Besides. Thing is damn heavy.". The one who said that suddenly would feel an intense spiritual pressure, strong enough to make his nose bleed.

As the Vice Captain came through a doorway, from the weirdly empty room popped out another person. It was one of the lesser seated member and they motioned Narue to get into one of the hiding spots. "She's coming! Quick." It was a whisper but the member hoped Narue would hide in time.

While they were motioning Narue to hide, another member approached Norma and bowed. Most everyone knew the woman's reputation as being a bitch. "Captain, if you would come with me? We are holding a surprise party and would appreciate either cooperation or showing up late."

And while that was going on, the one who had drawn the smallest straw had to go find the two poor members who had to get the gift from Hueco Mundo. It was a job that starting to be something people hoped not to get, what with the new Primera and her...odd ways. Still, it was an important one and wondering what was taking so long they had sent out another Shinigami to help. If three weren't enough this time to bring the present in time for the surprise... They HAD told the Primera when to show up to be sure the present would be with the others. The Arrancar seemed like the sort who would be angry if someone messed this up.

"Okay okay, hiding~" Narue said to one of the members as they showed her her hiding spot. Surprise parties were fun. She rarely got to experience them before becoming a shinigami, and she was happy. They were quite enjoyable.

"Yeah yeah yeah, I'm coming."

The old woman grumbled as she made her way to where the party was. Norma entered the room and sat in a chair in a corner as to avoid...well everyone. Norma missed her nap today, and was a bit grumpier than normal. Hopefully the party would cheer her up.

"Hey jack, I'm ready to boogy woogy woogy! Hey, I heard there was a party goin on in this joint."

Norma's eyes rolled when she heard this voice. Never in the history of ever, has someone annoyed her more than Silas Robertson, former captain of sqaud 11.

"Hey, Norma, you look like a bundle of laughs, jack!"

"Shut up you twit. It's Captain Higgins to you. You demoted yourself, remember?"

Si threw his hand up in the air in a dramatic fashion at Norma's reply.

"Hey, homie don't play that!"

Norma just rolled her eyes as she watched Si take a seat with a cheesy grin on his face.

With some of the stragglers coming in, the Squad waited impatiently and tried to shoosh that annoying Captain with a confetti cannon. The box from the Primera was placed and the others watched it was trepidation. What could top the 3047 cats from last year? The Vice Captain and her bird had finally arrived. No one forgot Hato-kun, not with the punishments Mei had forced on the ones who upset Narue with that gaffe.

This was really making Mei grumpy. She had planned the party to perfection and NO ONE had showed up at the appointed time. They hadn't been there when she walked in and feigned surprise, and all of the carefully prepared food was missing too. Now Mei had an idea of what was going on... She was assuming that blasted Primera had taken all her food and people to make her own party. One of those infamous Sake Parties.

Well Mei wouldn't stand for that. Punishments for everyone who was involved were running through her head when she stormed through the doorway of a large entrance area that was now...somehow blocked off and made into a room. As she did, a large roar of "SURPRISE!" almost knocked her off her feet and she stood dumbfounded at the amount of people who came out of hiding. Also she was dumbfounded at the amount of confetti that now was covering her and a large portion of the floor.

It was only a few moments of silence after the big surprise before there came a rumbling from the box. If someone were close enough and perceptive enough, they would hear a very low. "What? Surprise? Shit! Shit!" before a scrambling noise. A moment later, the lid of the box burst open and a Mali came tumbling out... along with the box, which fell over sideways. "S-SURPRISE!" Mali exclaimed, quickly scrambling to her feet! "Happy birthday, Mei!" Along with Mali, out of the box fell quite literally a tiny mountain of confetti, spilling onto the floor. The Primera espada made a clumsy, but enthusiastic attempt to fling some into the air before looking at her BEST FRIEND EVAR, hopefully.

"Hey, look here, hey, I didn't know what to get you, so hey, I got you some iced tea jack."

Si handed Mei a pitcher of iced tea, with slices of lemon floating on top. Norma rolled her eyes at this gesture. Si was such a moron. Norma got up from her seat and walked over to where the captain, the primera, and the idiot stood. She handed her beautifully wrapped package to Mei, and a half smile crossing her face.

"I thought these might look good on you."

Si looked at Norma, and the almost smile she had.

"Hey, looky here, hey, I didn't know you were able to be polite jack."

"Si, I hate you. I really do."

Now this was a surprise a real surprise party. Spitting out a few colorful pieces that had fallen into her open mouth, Mei wiped away the taste of tissue paper and was trying to take it all in at once. Norma and Si, her other squad members.. Narue and Hatokun... She couldn't go see them all at once and was torn between trying to greet someone properly and trying not to cringe at the moving box she was sure was from that weird Primera. When the Primera herself popped out, almost made Mei jump from the surprise. Mali brought so much confetti...and made a bit of a fool of herself but the heart was in the right place... She gave the arrancar a large smile and waved, while walking into the room a bit more. She was swarmed and accepted presents as she went, tears welling up. Accepting the presents, Mei nodded to Norma and everyone else walked to a table to set some down and then turned to the people waiting.

"Thank you all! This is a wonderful Birthday today, and you all showed up to share it with me." A bit of sniffles broke through and she scrapped her planned speech in favor of other things. "Everyone can eat while I open presents!"

The first one she opened was Norma's, knowing the grumpy woman would take it as a slight if she didn't. A beautiful set of jewelry shone and Mei smiled. "Oh these are amazing Norma. Tasteful as usual and I do like the color scheme between the wrapping and the bow. Narue? Mali? Do you see the colors? Quite nice."